Month: January 2015

#tbt Perception & Reality

Posted on by Fireborn Eli

I have been helping a friend through a breakup and sharing some of my experiences with her. I think I’ve learned something through every relationship and every crush. I have plenty of poetry about heartbreak.

This next one is not one of them.

Perception or Reality
I look back at what has come to be of this relationship between you and me.
Stemming out of nothing
and then unraveling at the seams.
Things fall apart
and so did we.
But there is certainly no negativity
and no animosity.
It’s  just the way things have to be.

But now I’ve had time to think about it, joke about it and analyze it.
(Because I could never cry about it).
My final realization is summed up in this declaration:
You weren’t man enough to deal with this womanly possession.
Need clarification?
It’s perception turned reality.
You perceived me as a woman therefore you pursued me.
I thought you were a man and let you you seduce me.
My perception was distorted but then I saw reality.
I was too much of a woman and you weren’t man enough for me.

Eli 1999

#truth
EliRemixed

#tbt Elastic Heart

Posted on by Fireborn Eli

#tbt: Elastic ♡

The words come out of your mouth and tumble onto my soul
Like ninja stars with poison tips causing hollowness.
I don’t have time to wince.
Gilette against my wrist
Your words slice just deep enough.
Your words hurt and burn
Not like a slap in the face
Not anymore anyway.
But like cold seeping in
Destroying from within

Eli. 2004

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

“Well I’ve got thick skin and an elastic heart, but your blade it might be too sharp. I’m like a rubber band until you pull too hard, I may snap and I move fast but you won’t  see me fall apart ’cause I’ve got an elastic heart.”
“Elastic Heart” by Sia

#truth
EliRemixed

Upgrade: Kick Rocks!

Posted on by Fireborn Eli

Lots of talk on social media and around the water cooler about resolutions and expectations this year. I’ve noticed a lot of people reevaluating  their relationships and making resolutions to start cutting people out of their lives. (Campaigning against the haters.) Deep down we may not care what everyone thinks but we certainly care about how some people see us.

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I’ve struggled with this concept for years. In one area of my life I have the people who care for me, support me, show pride in me, cheer me on and recognize my worth. In another area I have just as many people who simply don’t get me. These are the people who don’t agree with the choices I have made in my life. These are the people who cannot reconcile their narrow views with the person I represent. These people will probably never see me as the successsful, funny,  intelligent and strong woman that I am. I look in the mirror and I am proud of myself.

So am I cutting people off in the new year? Damn right I should. Not necessarily. I’m a firm believer that you cannot change people but you can change how you respond to them and the amount of influence they have on you.

So while I may not tell [some] people to kick rocks I will separate myself from their negativity. All I can do is stay true to myself and live this life on my terms.

And whoever’s not with it can kick rocks!!

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#truth
EliRemix

#tbt Hater

Posted on by Fireborn Eli

You hate me
Meet with the witch to mix your potions.
Incantations, candles & all that hocus pocus.
Don’t realize that the envious smoke blinds your eyes.
Pray for destruction ’til it bounces off the skies.
Bitter jealousy with every breath.
Spitting poison with every word & every lie.
Sign your soul off to the Devil just to see me die.
You waste your time.

So hate me.

6/99

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#truth
EliRemix

Update: No resolutions

Posted on by Fireborn Eli

I woke up with confetti in my hair.

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And although I don’t do New Year’s
Resolutions I have nothing against them. I’m not making any resolutions this year. I’m making promises.

I promise to wake up to more days with confetti in my hair in 2015. (Hey at least once)

I promise to have more fun with my husband & kids and push my extended family to do so as well. No more stuffy dinner parties like it’s just a random Sunday dinner.

No gym membership for me but I promise to eat better, exercise and have dance parties with my kids.

I promise to spend more time with people whose company I enjoy.

I promise to schedule vacation time this year.

I promise to continue working on becoming a better me.

Happy New Year everyone! May 2015 be full of good things for all of you and thank you for supporting my journey.

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#truth
EliRemix